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Old 02-08-2009, 01:13 PM
MrSmith MrSmith is offline
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 18
Post I cant control my tongue

Ive been married for close to 10 years. been going through a bunch of mess. I feel like i try to do what is right. yet in her eyes im doing something wrong. we have been going through so much mess that I dont want to be in the marriage anymore. the problem is Im Saved and its not as easy when you want to do the Lords will. (she's not saved [yet]) .

Today, she gets up asked our youngest to put on some cloths so they can go a few places. before she leaves I said. "were y'all headed". she said " to get something to eat and the grocery story, do you want to go" I said "no" about 2-3 min later she asked why I asked her that. I said to her, I guess Im just being nosey. she then said whats so different about today and any other day that I didnt want to go. I said I just didnt want to go. she then started to say, she doesnt believe me. I started saying, what was it that you dont believe. I was just being nosey, I didnt need to go. then she asked me again why I asked her that, is there something that i would have wanted? I mentioned that maybe I would have wanted something from a different store. then she started going on about me being unfare about how i treat her, and then I got lost. "treat you? how did I treat you?" Then comes all the questions and accusations from both of us. and this is all because I asked her were she was going.

during the conversation, we brought up old issues, new issues and even issues that havent even been published yet. she continues to say Im treating her mean and saying mean stuff to her. and she hasnt even considered the fact that she is no better than i am.

Here is the biggest hurt thats up todate:

Shes been wanting another house. she did research and we cant get another house yet. Ive been wanting another car, so i put off getting another car until we got the house.
She said "doesnt look like we can get the house for awhile so you may as well go and get a car" This was said a few times on different occations.
12/16/08 i got another car. 6,200 +tax and all that stuff comes to about 7,200. Im paying notes @ 230.00 a month.
Shes hot and bothered because her names not on it and I did it without her. she says " you did that just for you and didnt consider the family.
I appologised for weeks, tryed to take it back, put it on craigs list and even took it to carmax to try to get out of it because it hurt her feelings. nothing worked. I prayed the Lord forgive me, I wasnt trying to hurt her.
Yet every other day shes continually telling me how I went and bought a car without her help, without considering her feelings without thinking of the family the house hold expenses. she says. we have 3 kids, you didnt think about them. you only thought about yourself, she said everything she has, my name is on. but I got the car without her. this is on going sence i got the car.
I CANT TAKE IT BACK, I UNDERSTAND YOUR FEELINGS, WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? thats what i said to her.
I really dont know what to do. I want to leave and not come back.

I pay every bill in the house and DO NOT ask her for a cent. all i did was buy a car to drive around in. OH you want to know what kind it is?

I previously drove a 1990 Acura Legend (4door) Currently has 225,??? on it. The new is an 2001 Saab 9-5 (4door) 86,000 on it.
She drives a 2005 Trailblazer, about 55,000 on it. she pays her own car note. I pay my own car note. I didnt thik i was ding something wrong. i just wanted something newer to drive.
someone please tell me what i did wrong. Tell me what im not looking at. Im willing to except my faults. Please tell me what I did?
 

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