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Old 03-12-2009, 02:33 PM
Jeremy Jeremy is offline
 
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Posts: 232
Default Any Golfers?

http://www.sleazeballs.net/

http://abcnews.go.com/Blotter/WallSt...7066715&page=1
Go Bernie Go!
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Old 03-12-2009, 02:53 PM
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stephanos stephanos is offline
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Wenatchee WA
Posts: 885
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Golf is a perfectly good walk gone bad.

I can't get into Golf, since my dad spends his entire life sitting in his basement watching golf non stop. It's sad.

Peace and Love,
Stephen
  #3  
Old 03-12-2009, 05:25 PM
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Kiwi Christian Kiwi Christian is offline
 
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Location: Aotearoa
Posts: 242
Default The Pastor and Golf

There was once a pastor of a medium sized evangelical church, he was a good man, a good pastor but he had one weakness, golf.

One Sunday morning he woke up, preparing his mind for that morning's sermon when he had a look out of the window. Oh what a glorious morning, the sun had broken through the weeks of grayness and the sky was clear blue. At that moment he decided he had to play golf, even if it meant missing Church; he had a good team around him after all. So he phoned the associate pastor, explaining he was sick in a croaky voice,
"Can we pray for you?" they offered
"No, no it's not as bad as that" he croaked back and left them to take the service.
A brief pang of guilt was forgotten as once again he peered out of the window.

Up in heaven St. Peter, seeing all this wandered over to Jesus.
"Lord", he said, "have you seen what your servant is doing down here?"
"Yes Peter.", replied Jesus, "Don't worry, I have it all in hand."
"Okay Lord" said Peter and went to see what was happening now.

What was happening was the Pastor was lining up his first shot of the day, his wife left at home with a despairing shake of her head.
He breathed the cool, fresh air, "This is going to be a beautiful day" he thought to himself and let swing.
Crack, what a beauty, the ball sailed down the fairway.
"Oh yes this is going to be a beautiful day" he thought.

Again in heaven Peter walked over to the Lord and questioned "Lord do you see what's happening here?"
"Peter, leave it to me, it's all in hand"

The round was going wonderfully, in fact probably the best game he had ever played, yes, the best without a doubt, shame he had no-one to share it with, but circumstances prevented that really didn't they.
And suddenly there he was, the famous 18th hole, an enormous par five of renowned difficulty, could he maintain his form? Many a game had been lost on this one!
He lined himself up, took a final glance down the fairway to where it turned a bend and swung.

He had never seen his ball go so far, it was amazing, though it must overshoot the dogleg and go into the trees, what a shame. But no, it seemed to hit a tree and go around the corner, WOW what luck. He hurried down the fairway and rounded the corner until he saw the green still some way off. Now how far had it gone, where was that ball? He just kept on walking, no sign of it anywhere, surely it hadn't reached the green?! No he couldn't see it at, NO, it's impossible, AMAZING, there lying still IN THE HOLE was his ball. A HOLE IN ONE, HA HA, A HOLE IN ONE, AMAZING!!

Up in heaven that was just the final straw,
"WHAT IS GOING ON?" Peter yelled, "did you see that, did you do that? Is this some grace thing again? What are you doing Lord, your servant abandons his flock for some foolish game, lies to his elders and makes his wife do the same and this happens?! You give him the most amazing game he ha ever played and then that ridiculous hole in one, what's going on?"
"Yes Peter" replied Jesus, smiling, "I did give him all that, but there is one thing that you forgot...who's he going to tell?!!!!"
  #4  
Old 03-13-2009, 06:46 AM
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chette777 chette777 is offline
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Puerto Princesa City, Palawan Philippines
Posts: 1,431
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FOUR!!!
 

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