#1  
Old 01-11-2009, 03:39 PM
smw038
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Default I need help!

Hello everyone -

I'm new to this forum and I here because I'm so angry with my husband or maybe it's more like I so disappointed that I married him and now I feel stuck.

I'm a believer and he's not (although he claims to be) and I know what the Words says but I'm miserable. This is not the life I wanted for me or my children
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  #2  
Old 01-11-2009, 07:53 PM
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Here Am I Here Am I is offline
 
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Sister, I was saved in 2000, and then my husband got saved about a year later...so I have an idea of what you probably are feeling, what you are going through.

Whatever your situation, you (and I) have an awesome Saviour, Who knows pain, disappointment, frustration and anger, as He became flesh and dwelt with us, as one of us.

And He'll never leave you nor forsake you.

Give your problems to Him, and let Him handle them: He knows best.

I hope to see more posts by you. There are some wonderful people here, and plenty of fellowship as well as teaching.
  #3  
Old 01-11-2009, 09:11 PM
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George George is offline
 
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Default Re: " I need help!"

Quote:
Originally Posted by smw038 View Post
Hello everyone -

I'm new to this forum and I here because I'm so angry with my husband or maybe it's more like I so disappointed that I married him and now I feel stuck.

I'm a believer and he's not (although he claims to be) and I know what the Words says but I'm miserable. This is not the life I wanted for me or my children

Aloha sister,

Don't despair! My wife didn't get saved until about 4 years after we were married (in 1961). We have been married for almost 48 years, and I couldn't imagine being married to anyone else.

You need to concentrate real hard on being the kind of wife described in Proverbs 31: 10-31. You and your husband must have been in love at one time, and it is possible to '"renew" that love - but a lot is going to rest on you, and your conduct and attitude toward your husband.

1 Peter 3:1 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

This is the only place in the entire Bible where someone (a husband) can be won "WITHOUT the word"! And this is why I said that "
a lot is going to rest on you, and your conduct and attitude toward your husband". Do you want to see him saved? Then conduct yourself like the "holy women" of old, and follow Peter's advise and pray for him.

2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

7
Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

8
Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous:
9 Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
10 For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile:
11 Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it.
12 For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers: but the face of the Lord is against them that do evil.

It's not as if you are without hope - Trust in God:

Psalms 16:1 Michtam of David. Preserve me, O God: for in thee do I put my trust.

Psalms 18:2 The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower.


Psalms 62:8 Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Selah.

1 Timothy 4:10 For therefore we both labour and suffer reproach, because we trust in the living God, who is the Saviour of all men, specially of those that believe.
  #4  
Old 01-11-2009, 09:49 PM
smw038
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Unhappy Thanks

Thanks George and Here I am!

I know my attitude stinks but not only is he not saved he's selfish, hot headed and a terrible provider. He up and quit his job last year in April after we discussed that I would be leaving my job to concentrate on building my business which had gotten to be to much with a full time job and my 2 year old daughter and 15 year old son. He up and quit and now we have no health care and can't afford life insurance. I had to humble myself and apply for aid so that at least my children would have health care. I have so much resentment built up because he would rather see us struggle to pay the bills why he drives a Cadillac and our mortgage is behind but refuse to ever work for someone else every again. So, now he has a new business that won't even cover our bills, so now he throws parties every Thursday at some night club that someone was just shot and killed last week to make extra money.

I just feel like I'm in this marriage alone. Please pray with me because I know that God's Word is true but how to you honor someone who does not honor you and give you the respect you deserve and step up and be a man.

I thank the Lord that my son is saved and loves the Lord.

I'm going to ask the Lord to change my heart although my flesh wants to kick him to the curb.
  #5  
Old 01-12-2009, 02:14 PM
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ltpage ltpage is offline
 
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Quote:
I'm going to ask the Lord to change my heart although my flesh wants to kick him to the curb.
You got your work cut out for ya. Don't expect a miracle over night. God expects us to put some work behind our prayers.
Remember we'll be praying for you too.
  #6  
Old 01-12-2009, 02:50 PM
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Forrest Forrest is offline
 
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Location: Texas, USA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by smw038 View Post
Please pray with me because I know that God's Word is true but how to you honor someone who does not honor you and give you the respect you deserve and step up and be a man.
Your comments make me think of how the Son of God has honored me with His very person, presence, power, and provision. This make me rejoice in the abundant mercy, undeserved forgiveness, and unmerited grace that the Lord Jesus continues to bestow upon a dirty rotten sinner like me.

First things first.
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
You will never submit to your husband and win him to the Lord until you first fully submit unto the Lord Jesus yourself. Love and grow in grace and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.
2 Peter 3:18 But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and for ever. Amen.
Jesus must love through us. He is the only person who can live the genuine Christian life.
John 15:5 I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.

Galatians 2:20 I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.
John 3:30 He must increase, but I must decrease.
  #7  
Old 01-12-2009, 03:42 PM
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George George is offline
 
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Default Re: "I need help!"

Aloha sister,

I know that it is a lot easier to say: "Trust in the Lord", than to put it into practice. And the situation that you describe is deplorable.

Brother Forrest had some real good advice, and I know that he knows whereof he speaks.

I have an "inkling" (from your testimony) that you are in a very tenuous and difficult position. Having never had to deal with a situation like yours makes it is very difficult to give you much advice. Keep praying to God for a "solution" to your problems.

I know that God has given us "the ministry of reconciliation":
Quote:
2 Corinthians 5:18 And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation;
19 To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation.
And as such we (Christians) should seek to reconcile, if at all possible.

Try to live for the Lord; and conduct yourself like a Christian wife should; and keep praying that God will either save your husband, or if he is saved, that God will convict him and draw him back from his backsliding.

And whatever you do - do not despair or lose hope:

1 Peter 1:3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to his abundant mercy hath begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,
4
To an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away, reserved in heaven for you,
5
Who are kept by the power of God through faith unto salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
6
Wherein ye greatly rejoice, though now for a season, if need be, ye are in heaviness through manifold temptations:
7
That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ:

James 1:2
My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;
3 Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.


Hebrews 12:1 Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,
2 Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.
3 For consider him that endured such contradiction of sinners against himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds.

I pray, and I'm sure that there are others on this Forum who will pray with me, that God will comfort you in this time of trial and tribulation, and that He will bring about a solution to your problems real soon.
  #8  
Old 03-15-2009, 08:34 AM
Bibletotingunslinger Bibletotingunslinger is offline
 
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12 years, for me, praying, waiting, fighting, despair, Oh You ain't alone.
  #9  
Old 03-15-2009, 10:01 PM
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Cody1611 Cody1611 is offline
 
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I'll keep you and your husband in my prayers. May God's will be done.
  #10  
Old 04-07-2009, 12:23 PM
Renee Renee is offline
 
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Location: Broken Arrow, OK
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Default I need help

Quote:
Originally Posted by smw038 View Post
Hello everyone -

I'm new to this forum and I here because I'm so angry with my husband or maybe it's more like I so disappointed that I married him and now I feel stuck.

I'm a believer and he's not (although he claims to be) and I know what the Words says but I'm miserable. This is not the life I wanted for me or my children
I pray our Lord has answered prayers in your home. Has there been even the slighest improvement on the situation? Like George said it took 4 years of his patience and prayers befor I got Saved. God has been merciful and this year we made 48 years!!! It is not an easy road and I know I made things difficult for George at times. God answered his prayers and I know that only by the grace of God, George has kept me, and The Lord has kept us.

May Our Heavenly Father look upon you and shower you with answered prayers.

In Christ Love,
Renee
 

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