[PaulB]

Originally Posted by Amanda S.

If I read the thread correctly I am gathering that some interpret this passage to mean only if an unbelieving departs it is permissible to remarry? Is it a sin to remarry even if you've divorced over adultery?

I agree Amanda – Whether a person is a believer or an unbeliever they are joined together by God until death and not until their life or circumstances change. If a marriage is only valid in God’s eyes between believers then how could unbelievers be guilty of adultery?
The fact that Joseph kept clear of his master’s wife just goes to show that God recognises the sanctity of marriage regardless of their profession of faith (e.g. Herod –Herodias).

One of the things that I find is a growing trend today is where a married person joins a church and convinces themself that their marriage is not really a valid thing in God’s eyes because they don’t recognise God’s stamp of approval over their life before His intervention.

Some even argue that their “new slate” is like a new form of singleness and the fact that they are a new creation sort of annuls their previous connections to free them for a more suitable partner.

Thus they convince themselves that if one of them believes and the other doesn’t (in their existing marriage), then they can free themselves from their unequal yoke and find someone who is spiritually compatible. This exactly what Paul was speaking against in 1 Corinthians 7 in his attempt to protect the sanctity of marriage.

I have had different people come to me in the past and “profess” – yes “profess” their adultery in a way that suggests that God has lead them into their newly found relationship!
Normally, what they tend to do is – fall for someone – go missing for a while – split up from their spouse – move in with their new partner and once their adultery is established they want to come back into the church and convince everyone that they have repented.

My question is – where is the repentance? – that to me, is like robbing a bank, saying I’m sorry and keeping the money. When we start shoe horning exceptions into the clear words of Scripture we can justify anything. I don’t accept that time brushes sin under the carpet and makes everything alright again – but how shocking it is that the real criminal is the one who would dare to speak out against the sin of adultery.

God bless

PaulB

[greenbear]

What I don't understand is- when a divorced couple enter into adulterous relationships (remarriage) is it the Lord's will for them to leave those relationships and either remarry (or remain separated) to/from their "original" spouse? It's disturbing to think about the what happens to the children from this adulterous relationship.

Or does God forgive and sanctify (in the case of believers) the second "marriage"?

John 4:18 For thou hast had five husbands; and he whom thou now hast is not thy husband: in that saidst thou truly.

Christ seems to recognize five husbands. (I'm assuming she wasn't widowed 5 times.)

[Amanda S.]

Originally Posted by greenbear

What I don't understand is- when a divorced couple enter into adulterous relationships (remarriage) is it the Lord's will for them to leave those relationships and either remarry (or remain separated) to/from their "original" spouse?

Deuteronomy 24 says:

1  When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house.
2 And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife.
3 And if the latter husband hate her, and write her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, which took her to be his wife;
4 Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that is abomination before the LORD: and thou shalt not cause the land to sin, which the LORD thy God giveth thee for an inheritance.
5  When a man hath taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war, neither shall he be charged with any business: but he shall be free at home one year, and shall cheer up his wife which he hath taken.

Two wrongs do not make a right...

[Amanda S.]

Bro. Paul I wasn't exactly agreeing, but rather trying to understand the position.

My position on this topic is found in I Corinthians 7:27-28:

27 Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife.
28 But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you.

Paul advises it is best to stay single if you are loosED (past tense, divorced). Then he states that in the event you do remarry thou hast not sinned. Nevertheless he then warns that they will have trouble in the flesh...
Pretty clear to me.

[PaulB]

Hi Amanda – I’m so sorry, I misread your sentence!
Instead of reading “Is it a sin to remarry even if you've divorced over adultery?” – I read – It is a sin to remarry even if you've divorced over adultery!”

Concerning your response to my post - I think that Paul is referring back to the unmarried rather than the loosed in V28 (as the overall context does seem to imply that it is better to remain single rather than to marry) as such will have trouble – as the single are free to serve only one master.

I don’t believe that he is endorsing re-marriage but rather urging people to remain as they are – (i.e. if single, then stay like that – if married then stay like that). But if a person decides to go head and get married he/she has not sinned (as they probably would have thought that they were going against what he was teaching as an apostle). He wasn’t speaking against marriage as some of the may have been thinking but rather encouraging them to remain in their present state.

This fits perfectly in the context of what our Lord Himself taught on the same subject:

Mt.5:31 “It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.”

Hope this helps

God bless

PaulB

[greenbear]

Except for the cause of fornication, a husband who puts away his wife causes both her and the man she marries to commit adultery against him.

Matthew 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

And if that man remarries he commits adultery against her.

Mark 10:4 And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away.
Mark 10:11 And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her.

Marriage for born again believers isn't a carry over from the Law given to Israel but it was given to man and woman from the beginning.

Mark 10:5-9 And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

I believe the institution of marriage can only be perfectly honored by born again believers, it is for us a type of Christ and His body the church. I believe Jesus tells us there are no grounds for christians to divorce. Paul makes clear that if an unbelieving spouse leaves a believer then the believer is free to remarry in the Lord.

Romans 7:6 But now we are delivered from the law, that being dead wherein we were held; that we should serve in newness of spirit, and not in the oldness of the letter.

Many unbelievers pass from death unto life well into adulthood after a lifetime of sin, including multiple marriages. My understanding is that Paul is telling us that all of our sins are forgiven when we become new creatures in Christ. No matter if we're married to our umpteenth spouse when we're saved, that is our present circumstance and we should not seek to put away that spouse. I'm not sure if a person comes to the Lord as a divorced person that is not remarried that he/she is free to remarry. It seems to me Paul is saying that.

1 Corinthians 7:24 Brethren, let every man, wherein he is called, therein abide with God.
1 Corinthians 7:27 Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife.
1 Corinthians 7:28 But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you.

My husband and I came to Christ before we met, well into adulthood, and neither of us had been married before only by the grace of God. But there are many, many brothers and sisters that have divorced and remarried before and even after becoming believers. In either case, the question is: are they living under a continual curse, are their children bastards, or is there forgiveness and provision made by God for the hardness of our hearts?

Romans 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

These are very real issues for a lot of christians. I don't know the answer because God hasn't revealed it to me.

[Amanda S.]

Greenbear
I am sorry if it appeared I was disagreeing with you.

Except for the cause of fornication, a husband who puts away his wife causes both her and the man she marries to commit adultery against him.

Matthew 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

And if that man remarries he commits adultery against her.

Mark 10:4 And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away.
Mark 10:11 And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her.

Agreed.

As well as death (obviously) and desertion.

1Co 7:15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.

Many unbelievers pass from death unto life well into adulthood after a lifetime of sin, including multiple marriages. My understanding is that Paul is telling us that all of our sins are forgiven when we become new creatures in Christ. No matter if we're married to our umpteenth spouse when we're saved, that is our present circumstance and we should not seek to put away that spouse. I'm not sure if a person comes to the Lord as a divorced person that is not remarried that he/she is free to remarry. It seems to me Paul is saying that.

1 Corinthians 7:24 Brethren, let every man, wherein he is called, therein abide with God.
1 Corinthians 7:27 Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife.
1 Corinthians 7:28 But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you.

I believe your understanding to be correct Scripturally.

But there are many, many brothers and sisters that have divorced and remarried before and even after becoming believers. In either case, the question is: are they living under a continual curse, are their children bastards, or is there forgiveness and provision made by God for the hardness of our hearts?

While it is not a bad idea to make restitution for the wrongs you've done, there are times when that is not possible. If you can, great. Zacchaeus certainly was a fine example. But if you can't, your sins and mistakes still are forgiven and under the blood.

Consider this Scripture:

Eph 4:28 Let him that stole steal no more: but rather let him labour, working with his hands the thing which is good, that he may have to give to him that needeth.

11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

3 For we ourselves also were sometimes foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving divers lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful, and hating one another.
4 But after that the kindness and love of God our Saviour toward man appeared,
5 Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost;
6 Which he shed on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Saviour;
7 That being justified by his grace, we should be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

[greenbear]

Greenbear
I am sorry if it appeared I was disagreeing with you.

Not at all! I didn't consider Deut 24 and was glad you brought it out. It helped answer my question. I'm still undecided as to whether people who become believers as divorced people should remarry according to I Cor 7. Also unclear about believers who divorce and remarry while believers. Is there forgiveness and provision for sin, is the adulterous marriage sanctified? Etc, etc, ad nauseum.

[Amanda S.]

I'm still undecided as to whether people who become believers as divorced people should remarry according to I Cor 7. Also unclear about believers who divorce and remarry while believers. Is there forgiveness and provision for sin, is the adulterous marriage sanctified? Etc, etc, ad nauseum.

Greenbear, consider this article written by one of my husband's mentors.

http://www.learnthebible.org/remarriage.html

[greenbear]

Amanda, that's good. I agree with his comparison to murder; divorce is not something that can always be "taken back". It can be permanent loss like murder. They are sins, but they are not a 'state of sin" in which you continue after you are forgiven (when are we not?). Like PaulB brought out, many christians don't even recognize it as sin and apparently never acknowledge their transgression to God or to their brethren. Paul says we will have trouble in the flesh. I believe there are usually or always? consequences to our sin although there is no condemnation. Thank you for sharing that.