In order to sort this whole mess out, I believe we need to understand what marriage is and what divorce is. The following is adapted from an article I wrote (adapted so that it didn't sound so "teachy" since I am a woman and most of you guys are men).

It is no secret that marriage is under threat in society today. Well meaning Christians try to fight for godly marriage without really knowing what marriage is. So I am going to concentrate on what I believe the Biblical definition of marriage is and not some man made cultural rules.

Let’s begin with the book of Genesis, the book of beginnings. Most of the time, when a thing is first mentioned in the Bible, it indicates the meaning. This is commonly called the “law of first mention”. Genesis 2:24 gives us our definition, and it is the first mention of marriage. “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” The Biblical definition of marriage is when flesh joins flesh. Marriage is consummation, not a wedding ceremony.

Another proof text for the Bible definition of marriage being sexual relations is found in 1 Corinthians 6:15-16. “Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? Know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? For two, saith he, shall be one flesh.”

There are several mentions of marriage suppers or feasts in the Bible, but never the mention of a wedding ceremony. That’s because a ceremony does not equal marriage. Consummation equals marriage. An example of this is in Genesis 38:8 where it says “And Judah said unto Onan, go in unto thy brother’s wife, and marry her, and raise up seed to thy brother.” Onan already had a wife, but Judah was commanding Onan to have sexual relations with Tamar to produce an heir as was commanded by Jewish law. Instead of telling Judah to “have sexual relations” with Tamar, he told him to “marry” her, which means the same thing. Judah and Tamar did not have a wedding ceremony, they had what would be seen today as “a one night stand”. Yet God considered this as marriage.

In Genesis 24 we read about the marriage of Isaac and Rebekah. They did not have a wedding ceremony, they simply consummated and that was marriage. “And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mothers death.”

Many young people in our society have had several marriages although they have never had a wedding ceremony. They have also had several divorces although they never had a ceremony, for divorce is when flesh leaves flesh. They consummated, had flesh join flesh, and then tore it apart in divorce by going on to another person.

In the Old Testament, God had a divorce. He "put away" Israel.

I believe this needs to be understood before discussing the topic of divorce etc.