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Old 10-18-2008, 05:32 PM
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 57

Originally Posted by Vendetta Ride View Post
Point of order, brethren: I've raised this matter before, but it bears repeating. The Bible isn't "inspired." It is "given by inspiration". It may sound like nitpicking, but when we're dealing with the way God described His own revelation, it's not.

I believe that the original manuscripts were "given by inspiration," and perfectly preserved, as promised, over the centuries, resulting in the KJB, which is the only English version that is God's word. (I'm not talking about Valera or other foreign language versions.) I'll go even farther: I believe the KJB, regardless of the translators' humility, was also "given by inspiration." Even the paragraph divisions and punctuation were, as a certain teacher says, "providentially guided."

But "inspired" is simply the wrong term, and gives enemies of the KJB a weapon with which to attack us. In discussing God's written word, let's be careful to use God's terminology.
"Yes...Yes...You are correct sir!"(Phil Hartman as Ed McMahon to Johnny Carson). You are not nitpicking. The word of God doesn't say: "was given by inspiration" but rather "IS given by inspiration", as you stated. Yet the "modernists" seems to believe that inspiration was a one time event which took place during the scatching out on various types of papyrus of the "original" autograph. There is no SCRIPTURE anywhere that says: "The original(s) WAS given by inspiration."

"My bad?" translation?: My fault, dude.

I am currently revising "the" Bible to be "marketed" to the sports world! This "version" "recognizes the need" to "translate" the now outdated, "archaic" wording of the obviously outdated, KJB to our "sports idols." Here is a sample:

"Ya, know, that Jesus DUDE really stepped up. He really gave 110 percent."

Any suggestions from the board would be appreciated. I have not obtained copyright on this version as of yet, but I would appreciate if you would cite my name if you cite the above "revised" verse. After all, I am an "expert" in "the Sports English", and "any transmission, rebroadcast, or copyright of this verse without the expressed permission of the 'John M. Expert In Making A Killing By Revising And Writing A New 'the Bible' Version Every Year 2 months Corinthians 2:17 Bible Factory, Incorporated' is prohibited."

Hurry and order now, and I will include "The Readers Digest Condensed Version of the Bible" with you ordering my new and improved "the" Bible!! This order will expire by midnight tonight, or whenever the next "new and improved" version of "the Bible"(or is that "the Bibles"?) is released, whichever comes first! Oh, too late. Another "the Bible" version was just released as I was writing this post.

I am glad sarcasm is a biblical principle.

In Christ,
John M. Whalen